A Rose by any other name...is still a weird story

Working at Universal studios gave me a unique opportunity too meet interesting and diverse people. Through one of the girls at Starbucks, I got to meet her boyfriend, the lead singer of Green Jelly. There are probably only 17 people in the country who would care about that. For me, it was exciting.

As anyone who knows me knows, I'm a huge hit with the ladies. Sometimes I even shock myself with how awesome I am. Um...or, not. I get delusional.

I don't know how to be "smooth" with the ladies. I see other guys with the lines, and the cologne, and the "right stuff." I don't know how any of that works. I'm just a simple guy who wants a relationship. Is it ever that simple? Nope.

Universal is where I met Rose. She worked outside the movie theater, selling this movie/dinner deal. There are two requirements for this job: you have to be female, and attractive. No skinny white nerds. I think Rose was from Puerto Rico, or Venezuela, or something. But, she was very beautiful, and to my surprise, friendly. She had a nice smile, and she turned a lot of heads. I was happy to learn that she had a college degree, and she wanted to be a lawyer. That made her even more attractive to me. I began talking to her, (and all the other girls who worked outside the movie theater). It didn't take long before I realized I was interested in this young lady. Why not ask her out, right?

After seeing her on multiple occassions, mostly while "working", I decided the moment was at hand. Rose's friend was my relationshp liason, and a little devil on my shoulder. She kept telling me to ask Rose out, she would go for it. So, one day, the moment of truth arrived. I felt like a nervous 16 year old dork asking a girl to a school dance, or something. My palms were sweaty. I walked over to Rose, where she was "working." (By working, I mean standing outside the theater one afternoon, bored.) and I started some mindless chit chat. I tried to organically move the conversation toward me asking her out, but it didn't happen. I was running short on time, and I knew I had to act fast. So, I began stammering. "Um,...you know,...I was just wondering, since we only see each other at work,...there's this place...could eat lunch,...or..."

It was the most awkward moment of my life. She was clearly uncomfortable. She tripped over her words nervously as she replied. "Um...I have to check my schedule. So,..I don't know."

Check her schedule?!? I walked away in humiliation. That line, "check my schedule", is worse than "I have to wash my hair." That's awful! So, in my embarassment, I walked away in defeat. I guess there's no such thing as a sure thing.

In the days following, I prayed that I wouldn't see Rose at work. I was afraid it would be far too humiliating. One afternoon, my relationship liason, Rose's friend, approached me.

"Evan! Rose was really happy you asked her out the other day. She said she wishes you'd been more confident, though. She really did have to check her schedule."

What?!?

"I think if you ask her out, she would definitely go with you. You just have to be more confident."

Um...okay. So, it wasn't just a line? Well, I guess that was good news, at the time. It's what I wanted to hear. So, the next time I saw Rose at work, I quickly approached her.

"Hi, Rose. So,...I know things were somewhat off-track the other day. It's just that, well, since you don't work tomorrow, we should have lunch."

"Um...I already told some friends of mine that I would have lunch with them. Sorry."

"What about the next day?"

"Oh,...um,...I'm busy. Sorry."

Shot down. Twice. That's miserable.
A few days later I flew to Tennessee for a wedding, and when I came back to L.A., Rose had quit her job. So, I guess I'll never see her again. It's probably for the best, though.

Plus, one time I saw Drew Carey at Bob's Big Boy.